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FOULDS: Cats are cooler than dogs — and they have eight more lives
Last week (and, it seems, the week before that and the week before that and the week before that . . . ) city council went to the dogs, proving yet again why it’s preferable to own a cat.
The city has a bylaw that limits per-household ownership to two dogs.
(Although, in reading the city’s Dog Responsibility and Control Bylaw, perhaps a crafty lawyer could make the argument three dogs are indeed permitted. The bylaw states: “ . . . If you have more than 2 dogs you can apply to Council for a variance to have more than 3 dogs or a combination with other animals for a total of 4 animals.” It states if one has more than two dogs, one can apply to have more than three dogs. Does that infer one need not apply to have three dogs?)
In any event, the bylaw has created some rough times for canine owners in Kamloops this year since council has, for this calendar year only, decided to waive the normally non-refundable $350 fee to ask for permission to own more than two dogs.
As a result, city council meetings in the cramped chambers down at city hall have often been dominated by lengthy appeals from dog owners, pleading for one reason or another for permission to keep a third or fourth dog.
Interestingly, while the focus has been on the two-dog bylaw, the city’s animal-control bylaw also limits the number of cats per home to two.
That would likely be a surprise to the half-dozen felines and their owners in numerous homes in Kamloops, likely because cat registration — as opposed to dog registration — is voluntary and carries with it a one-time $40 fee per animal.
Dogs, on the other hand, must be registered, with the owners required to pay a yearly fee ranging from $60 to $200, depending on whether the dog is neutered, considered a dangerous mutt, etc.
Tearful appeals at city hall for more dogs has also led to marathon council meetings.
If there’s anything on earth that need not be longer, it’s Grey Cup half-time shows and city-council meetings.
So, to spare the lives of poor reporters who cover city hall, perhaps those pleading for permission to have an extra dog will consider crossing to the dark side and embrace a feline.
Well, because cats are cooler than dogs and superior in so many ways.
Don’t believe me?
I give you evidence as put forth by the Secret Society of Cat People, which has a website that describes why cats are better than dogs.
• Cats smell better than dogs.
• Cats are funnier than dogs.
• Even the loudest cat is quieter than the most-relaxed dog.
• Cats are natural insect repellents.
• Cats don’t need to be walked.
• The purr of a cat is preferable to the pant of a dog. Purring is, hands-down, the best sound in the animal kingdom.
• Cats, from the moment of birth, are smart enough to know where to go to the bathroom without creating a mess on the rug.
I would add one more reason — because cats don’t lead to insanely long council meetings with more anguish and emotion than the Sunday Night Hallmark Hall of Fame Movie — but I wouldn’t want to offend the city’s dog owners.