Editor:

Re: Some grads face bitter reality, It’s my dime, Opinions, the Observer, July 6.

I really enjoyed Annie Gallant’s article on the downside of grad.  My own kids graduated a long time ago (1989 and 1991) but through the years I’ve had a lot of misgivings about grad and the way it’s carried out.  The grads and their parents that I have talked to over the years have all said that the grads themselves have very little say in their dry grad celebration.  I think there’s something wrong with that. 

 We organize our kids to death from the time they’re born.  Too many children have every minute of the day plotted out for them and would be lost if they were told to go outside and play. 

 They get all the way to grade 12 and who’s at the helm still organizing their last hurrah?  Their parents, of course.  Here we have young adults who are almost ready to vote, get jobs and get married and their parents are still in there, planning every detail of the grad party.  I don’t get it.  Eighteen year olds should be planning the whole celebration themselves and I know they’d do an excellent job. 

  I think if they were left to their own devices, grad could get back to a simpler event where some of the grad class wouldn’t have to stay home because they couldn’t afford to attend.  I remember feeling sad for our kids’ friends and acquaintances who couldn’t afford the gowns and tuxedoes and just stayed home that night.  I also know a lot of parents who held their noses while they paid the big bucks so their child could be part of the action, even thought they didn’t agree with it.   There are students and parents out there who wish things could change. It’s quite common for a high school dry grad to cost $20,000.

 We attended our niece’s graduation from UNBC a few years ago.  It was a simple, elegant, and meaningful cap and gown ceremony. Five years of hard study but no hoopla. 

 A friend in a small, northern Manitoba town told me that for this year’s grad, the onus was on each grad to raise $750 to pay for the celebration.  Quite a few of the class opted out of their own grad; they just didn’t think it was worth it. 

 I remember when I worked at a local dental office and had to stamp a Grade 12 student’s pink slip that allowed him to miss an hour of school to attend a dental appointment.  I thought it was ludicrous that he’s on his way to university and the world beyond and at 18 years old, the school insists on a stamped note from the dentist to prove he’s been there.   I’ve suggested to many teachers and administrators that by Grade 11, the reins should be loosened,  and by Grade 12 the students should be treated like the young, responsible adults that they are, as they will be treated next year when they’re at university, college, or trade school. That way so many of them wouldn’t crash and burn when they leave home. 

 Dora Kolody

Quesnel